Insights
by Mistressdickens
Summary: A series of insights into characters stretching across the entire six series. Little moments when we wonder what they are thinking, or times when there's been a time jump and we'd love to know what happened in the interim. Requests for chapters taken, all characters considered. Tagged characters quite at random
1. Molesley S6E3

**A/N: I'm intending these to be a series of reflections on various characters throughout the series. No clear pattern, just moments I'd love to see or delve deeper into what might be going through their minds. Requests are warmly welcomed at any time, I'm planning on these being ongoing for as long as there are things to talk about.**

Molesley S6E3

He once expressed the thought that he'd had his career backwards. He had achieved the pinnacle of what a man in service could hope to aspire to, and it was just his luck that he should therefore start to go backwards. He never had been able to hold on to anything for long.

He had learned lessons in humility when he reached the depths of where life could take him, and got work as a road mender, although he had had to remind himself about this on occasion, and allow his position as footman to run in parallel to his higher expectations. He had to be content with what he had.

He thinks he might finally be used to the weight of disappointment that he hasn't made more of his life. The abbey is a good place to work, even though Mr Carson's standards are exacting. The blossoming relationship between the man and Mrs Hughes – Mrs Carson now he thinks, as he stands on one side of the school house watching half the village (or so it seems) mill about – has not mellowed the professional side of him. Indeed sometimes, Mr Molesley sense that when the two have had an argument it is the rest of the staff who bear the brunt of the frustration the butler feels.

They have a very different relationship to the Bateses, he thinks, and it is intriguing to watch them interact.

He has been drifting about the school house for some minutes, making small talk with those he comes across, but mostly content to ponder his life. He had been speaking of Daisy to Mr Dawes and found himself getting quite passionate about her potential. He has been delighted to see how well she has got on, and pleased to help in any way he can. He is glad to share his enthusiasm with someone else.

Mr Dawes' question about having missed his vocation didn't really do much more than skim his sense of disappointment which covers everything else, but now he actually thinks on it, he finds himself questioning his choices.

They – whoever 'they' are – say that the age of the great houses is almost dead. The world of Downton is shifting and although he is sure there will always be a need for a cook, butler and housekeeper – no family could be expected to manage without some help in a house that size – he knows that the need for other staff will diminish. He wonders.

Wonders if it might not be too late for him to change careers. Hr has enjoyed helping Daisy find her way, it's very possible he will enjoy helping others do the same. He would have to leave the abbey, but could remain in the village, which would be the best of both worlds really. A purpose at last, but still able to see her. Miss Baxter, he whispers to himself. Not as often as he does now, but perhaps that might make it easier to court her, when he's not getting under her feet in his eagerness to see everything through her eyes.

She doesn't need to be protected from Mr Barrow anymore, indeed they seem to have come to some sort of understanding, therefore all he now has to offer is his love, which he hopes she'll accept, although he finds it difficult to believe he could be that lucky.

A change at his time of life, he muses as he carries on meandering about the hall. It would strike him as hilarious and impossible were it not for the fact that another man dedicated to a life of service has just made the biggest change imaginable. Mr Carson is about to speak and Mr Molesley tucks his thoughts away for another time. Miss Baxter stands by his side, and for now he is content to listen as he hears how change has brought happiness to other lives.

His time will come, he thinks. He hopes.

 **A/N: I really think Molesley would make quite a good teacher, just so long as the children don't tease him. He's a bit of a Mr Chips in that way. I used the word love in relation to his feelings for Miss Baxter, although I'm not quite sure if he'd allow himself to use it. After Ep 4, though, it's so clear how he feels that I just can't help myself.**

 **Reviews would be lovely, and if anyone would like a particular insight, please do request them.**


	2. Isobel S3 CS

**A/N: This is how I imagine Isobel might have felt upon hearing the news that Matthew is dead. He said he'd sent her on to tell everyone the news Mary had had her baby, so I think she would have been at Downton. Based on Isobel's words at some point in season four about how losing a child robs you of purpose (paraphrasing, but I can't find them anywhere right this minute). TW for death and loss.**

Her life has lost all meaning in an instant. She had been the happy bearer of news to the anxious inhabitants of the abbey and now, a mere hour later, they have all been shell-shocked, destroyed, by the information a policeman and a sturdy man wringing his hat in his hands have imparted to them.

Matthew, her son, Mary's husband, the heir of Downton, and new father is dead.

She cannot grasp it. She sits on one of those red sofas in the library, deaf to the concerned murmurs around her and thinks of all that her golden boy has had to overcome in his short life. The loss of his father, darling Reginald, had forced him to become a man too soon; she admired the way he had risen to the challenge of being head of a household even as he firmly attended to his studies. He had told her would make her proud, and oh, how he had excelled in doing so. For years it had been just the two of them. They shared a sense of humour that delighted in the ridiculous and a strong passion to do good in the world.

Both of these things had helped them to cope with the snobbish attitudes which they had encountered at the abbey on their first visit. She had seen, though, how absolutely captivated he had been by Lady Mary from their first meeting. She had worried initially that the girl would break his heart, but soon saw that he brought out the best in her. Beneath the ice queen persona, a warm and loving woman waited.

Even after they broke things off and found new partners, she still noted the special friendship they had. Isobel had been amazed by the changes the war wrought in Mary and even though she had been preoccupied by power at the time, she saw the longing glances, no matter how hard they tried to hide them. In the end they found each other, as Isobel always sensed they would. Her darling boy had been through so much danger and at the end of it has gained a prince's fortune. A wife he loves, land he sees the value in and a son to be the apple of his eye.

And now all that is lost because he had been killed in the worst way, on the happiest day of his life, and the pain is unbearable. She will never again see him smile. Never hear his quick wit or his plans for Downton. His son will never know him or have the benefit of his common sense against the propriety his mother will enforce. She cannot bear the pain or the injustice of it all. She had thought to lose him twice before, had reconciled herself to the fact on both occasions, and when he rose from the ashes she started to believe he was charmed. To be third time unlucky is terrible and unfair and plain wrong. She wants someone to blame, but the truck driver can hardly be held accountable and the only other person she can think of is God and to direct anger to that quarter would be a complete waste of energy. Life goes on, except that it doesn't and she knows that hers will be an empty shell from now on.

She will go on, because to take another route would be unthinkable, but she will never feel whole again. The centre has been ripped out of her.

She is dimly aware that the others are speaking of Mary. She still doesn't know. Matthew's body is being brought here to be laid out and therefore the hospital will have no inkling of the tragic events. Someone will have to tell her. Robert and Cora are debating which one of them it should be, but that's not what should happen. Isobel finds herself standing and offering to do it. She is the only one, after all, who can possibly understand and who will fully share in her grief. Dr Clarkson ought to be telephoned though to warn him of the impending catastrophe which is about to destroy the happiness within his hospital.

Isobel moves towards the entrance of the abbey, hardly aware of those about her, nor the stricken face of Carson as he helps her into the car. She sets her face forward as the vehicle propels her towards her terrible task. Once it is done she will have no purpose anymore and will live the rest of her life like a rudderless boat. It is not what Matthew would have wanted, but then he wouldn't have wanted to die either.

He is dead and to a certain extent so is she. Her life is over, the rest is just existence.

 **A/N: Heavy I know, but I honestly believe this would have been game over for Isobel in terms of life having any real purpose. A review or two would be lovely, and if you'd like an insight into any character from any season or episode, let me know!**


	3. Thomas S6E7

**Thomas S6E7**

 **A/N: A little drabble on Thomas based on certain theories after trigger warnings were noticed for the write up of episode 8. I wanted to get this written before the episode airs.**

The poetic parallel of his viewpoint at this moment is not lost on him. There he sits, at his place at the table, looking down the long narrow corridor as his co-workers (he cannot call them friends) gather about an emotional, but happy Mr Molesley as they celebrate his success.

He is alone. An outsider looking in at the easy way everyone else has with each other. He cannot help the stab of jealousy that stings his chest, but at the same time he sees the irony. He has been invited to join in and yet here he sits. He just can't quite allow himself to believe that he would be welcome. Even if he was, he would most likely ruin the moment with a seemingly sarcastic comment. It is the way he operates, but with his past history of scheming and nasty put downs, it always comes across as though he doesn't care.

He had told Mrs Hughes that he felt like he had put down roots here, and it was true, but it really seems like those roots are attempting to cast him off. They don't want him. No one wants his company and no one wants to employ him. Mr Carson has hardly been sympathetic to his trials and all his past misdemeanours have weighed heavier in the balance against him than the many years of hard work.

Just as after the war, when his desperation to leave a life of service made him burn his bridges rather too spectacularly, so now he feels the lack of warmth towards him. Back then, he could at least prove his use to return to the abbey. Now there is nothing he can do, and he will so find himself set adrift. As much as his old self might have told them all to stuff their pity, now he just wants someone – anyone – to put up a fight to have him stay. Even Mrs Hughes, with all her practical sympathy, directs it towards encouraging him to go elsewhere.

He wants to stay in Yorkshire, even though London might be better for someone with his tastes. But London is a place to be ignored, to lose yourself and Thomas very much wants to be seen. To make an impression. Being a small fish in a big pond does not suit him.

He has no idea what to do with himself. If he is rejected once more, he doesn't think he could stand the shame, nor the waning patience of his employer. Nobody wants him to stay, and if a now job proves to be an impossible aim, then other decisions will have to be taken. He can't fight for something nobody wishes to give, and he very much doubts if anyone would notice if he makes other plans. He also doubts if anyone will lament for long, or at all, when those plans are put into action.

He looks down the corridor at the happy people framed in the kitchen doorway and finds he has never felt more alone than at this moment. It can't get much worse, and he doubts if it can ever get better.

He will not join them now. Instead he stands and makes his way up to his room to plan his future.

 **A/N: I feel like we are being asked to be supremely sympathetic to Thomas in this final season, in preparation for whatever episode 8 has to throw at us, but I find it problematic that we are supposed to forget every unkind, manipulative, devious, cruel (etc) thing he has done since the beginning of series one. He may well be trying to turn over a new leaf, but he's not doing a brilliant job (evidence, his dropping Gwen in it, his smirking, his really bad timing (he could've left the Carson's alone on the sofa, not imposed. He just wanted to talk to someone, but there are times and places).**

 **All this being said, it would be terrible if what we suspect will happen (I'm being so vague, ha ha) actually does. I don't think he will succeed, and that's why I tried to end on a positive note, with the word 'future'. I think he does have a future, and hopefully those about him will help him to realise this in ep 8 and the christmas special.**

 **I could go on, but I'll shut up now. Reviews, as ever, are HUGELY appreciated.**


	4. Carson S6E8

**Carson S6E8**

 **A/N: I've had lots of wonderful suggestions for insights, which I'll get around to eventually, but I'm toying with a multi-chapter fic covering various unseen elements from Thomas's suicide in ep8, and this needed to be written. TW's for references to suicide, but nothing major.**

Charles Carson is brushing his teeth at the end of a very long day which has provided more than its usual quota of shocks. He has been focussing on the movement of the brush, but as he stares into his own eyes in the mirror above the sink, his action stills and he searches his face for any hint as to how these events could have possibly unfolded.

His eyes widen as the thought occurs to him that it is highly probable that he has played a very large role in the drama that is Mr Barrow's attempted suicide. The toothbrush falls from his hand, and he spits the froth from his mouth, before abruptly sinking onto the chair his wife keeps to one side of the bath for purposes he is yet to fathom.

He has been exposed to death before, of course he has. Quite apart from the plethora of young people taken before their time in recent years, he was witness to the late Earl's demise, as well as a very old gardener, who he had found in the greenhouse many years ago. But suicide – no one has ever done such a thing at Downton. He is at a loss to fathom what could a person to such an act. Quite apart from the fact it is a grievous sin, or so the church would have him believe, he cannot imagine anyone feeling such despair to be driven to the edge like that.

He has not always been fair to Mr Barrow, he will admit, although the man has done nothing to help his own cause over the years. The schemes hatched with Miss O'Brien, his sarcastic and patronising manner, the high handed way he asserted his position during the war, not the mention the incident with Jimmy, all make it very difficult to appreciate the man. It is easier to brush over the fact he is an exceptionally hard worker and clearly cares for the family, if his sorrow at Lady Sybil's death and his antics with Master George are anything to go by. It is easier to forget these things because it makes dismissal simpler, except that, like a bad penny, Thomas always turns up again, ready to serve, but only in so far as it serves himself. Or so it seems to Mr Carson.

He sighs, staring at his linked hands in his lap, and tries to fathom precisely what it is about the man that aggravates him so entirely, and causes him to be downright mean. The man is so unlike himself, showing such disdain for the life of service that has played such an important part in Charles's life. That, he muses, is the thing he finds hardest to accept and forgive.

It would surprise many people, Thomas included, to know that he is not quite so disgusted by the personal preferences of the under butler as he once was, and indeed this rarely factors into his dislike. True, he acted on impulse when Mrs Patmore raised the suspicion over his intentions towards Andy, but that had far more to do with the avoidance of scandal than personal distaste. There is no hiding from the fact that Thomas's desires are illegal, and whilst the house might be able to withstand a dead Turkish diplomat, a child born out of wedlock and a chauffer upstairs, there is only so much people are willing to overlook. The world may be changing, but it's not changed that much.

His Lordship's need to retrench has made it easier to try and push Thomas out the door. At last, a situation not even he could find an angle to exploit. Money is money after all. Thomas only needed to find a job, which wasn't that hard surely.

Ah, but how would he know? He's been here for most of his life, calmly and quietly moving up the ranks. It is a luxury that seems to be slipping away from the younger generation.

It seemed such as easy plan, but Thomas appeared reluctant to move on, which baffled Charles immensely. It wasn't as if he had anything to stay for her, although Elsie thought otherwise, and had told him of the surprising conversation they had had in the courtyard only days before.

He has been very blind, Charles realises, with a shuddering sigh. The war had long since finished and Thomas could've found a new position very easily after his foray into independence had gone sour. Instead he proved himself indispensable, especially in those lean months. Lady Mary had warned him to be careful back then, but even she seems to have changed her mind about the man, and there is no ignoring his connection to Master George.

It is a funny thing to see someone else fill the role of children's confidante and entertainer, but, now he thinks about it, Charles does not resent the connection. He has no experience with little boys after all, and has always felt his talents lay in calming female tempers. He has caught himself imagining the kind of children he and Elsie might have produced if they had begun earlier, and they are nearly always girls.

But now is not the time for such ruminations. The point is that Thomas's link with Master George reveals, more than anything else could, that Thomas Barrow is capable of feeling far more than he ever imagined possible, and even if that were the only merit in his character (which it is not, Charles reminds himself) he should be allowed to stay in the position to which he has devoted most of his life.

He is not so very different from me, thinks Charles, half amused and half rueful, even if life has hardened the younger man. Perhaps if they, he, were kinder, the true Thomas would emerge. He has a heart, no matter how hard he tries to hide it.

Charles stirs from his thoughts. He can hear Elsie move about their bedroom, preparing for bed. He has been in the bathroom far longer than brushing his teeth requires, but she has not come to check on him. She knows how much Thomas's actions have thrown him into turmoil and he'll speak to her when he's ready. He needs to speak to his Lordship too, for it is clear that the only place for Thomas is Downton.

Once that is fixed, he will pay the man himself a visit, to give him the news and apologise for his past actions. Thomas may not forgive him, but it will be worth the attempt.

Tonight though, he will embrace Elsie and fall asleep in her arms. With those final thoughts, Charles opens the bathroom door and walks out to his waiting wife.

 **A/N: I hope this does both the characters justice. Neither one is perfect, and as much as I like Carson, I can see how large a portion of blame can be laid at his door. Having said that, Thomas is not a saint, although I wouldn't wish death on him. I quite like him for his Machiavellian ways. As I said, I'm planning a longer fic to look at events, but I'm probably not going to get to that until Christmas!**

 **A review or two would be wonderful ….. although no pure Carson hate please! Constructive criticism is fine though!**


	5. Beryl S3E3

**Mrs Patmore S3 E3**

 **A/N: I'm still working on the next chapter of Thirty Years, but I felt the need to write something else, to clear my mind, and one of these insights seemed like a perfect plan. A little study of friendship and the possibilities of love.**

The road to friendship for the fiery redhead and the equally forthright Scot has been long, arduous and frequently paved with seemingly insurmountable obstacles. But they have finally reached a point where mutual support is the preferred option to pitched battles.

Perhaps, Beryl Patmore thinks one evening after a series of events has showed how important their friendship is, it has something to do with their age. They are both approaching sixty (Elsie a little quicker) and in a world of demanding work and youthful indiscretion, they find themselves more in need of confidantes and shared quiet than they did before.

True enough Elsie Hughes was a support to the cook when ill health loomed in the form of cataracts and stress induced attacks, but the help had been offered in terms of practical considerations, a business transaction to ensure the continued smooth running of the household. Now, as Beryl has become the sole support for the housekeeper's fears regarding her own ill health, there is a softness which neither found necessary before.

Beryl has never been comfortable with illness, the possibilities that have to be faced alarm her, which is why, once she admitted things were wrong, she surrounded herself with as much support as possible. Elsie, on the other hand, seems determined to go through these initial stages alone, although she is quite as susceptible to worry, and has wept on Beryl's shoulder more than once when the thought that she might be nearing the end of her life at the age of 58 overwhelms her. But in general, she has been as calm and collected as she ever was, although to Beryl's knowing eye, she tires more easily.

Not that anyone else has noticed, least of all Mr Carson. His expectations remained high, especially with Lady Edith's wedding on the horizon, although even he has noticed something is amiss now, and is bumbling around, trying to relieve the pressure whilst simultaneously not letting on that he knows.

Elsie Hughes is not so easily fooled, and has labelled him a hopeless liar, but to Beryl Patmore's eyes, his halting care should be something of a comfort. If the worst is revealed when the results come back to Dr Clarkson, Beryl is sure Mr Carson will do everything in his power to ensure Elsie's last months are comfortable, if only the stubborn woman will let him.

Beryl cannot fathom why he has been left in the dark when the friendship between the three of them is so strong. In a world of rules and strict hierarchy, the only people the three heads of the household can truly trust with their private concerns are each other. To leave Mr Carson on the outside of this does him a disservice. If the situation were reversed, Beryl thinks, Elsie would have winkled the truth out of him long ago, and forced him to accept her help. She did so when the Spanish flu visited the house. Why this should be any different, why Elsie think that allowing him to view her as a sick woman will do anything to alter his other perception of her baffles Beryl entirely.

He may not say so in so many words, but it is clear Mr Carson cars deeply for the housekeeper. His polite concern that he expressed earlier in the years has, Beryl believes, shifted to something altogether deeper. He appears to have come to a realisation of what, exactly, could be lost to him. Not just an efficient colleague but also the warm and generous woman behind that persona. And, Beryl notes, as he has come to this new understanding, the woman herself has sought to set him further apart from her, to build an invisible barrier that will make separation easier if the worst should happen.

Beryl does not pretend to understand, although she has given up trying to force Elsie to be open. To her mind, if you care for someone, surely you will want their support. Unless … a new angle presents itself, which is both surprising and yet totally obvious. Elsie Hughes loves Mr Carson; loves him in the way a woman does a man, but also without the hope that the emotion will be returned. Her silence continues because she does not want a deathbed declaration, and if she is not ill, then she will continue as she has before. Beryl is suddenly absolutely sure that this is not a new regard that the housekeeper has kept hidden in her breast, along with possibly traitorous cells which seek to destroy.

Can Mr Carson ever turn his mind to romance? Beryl is not certain, although she has seen the way he looks at Elsie when her thoughts are elsewhere. There is certainly a softness that wasn't there before, but that could just be the natural reaction to her ill health.

Only time will tell. Tomorrow, Dr Clarkson will reveal if Elsie Hughes is to live or die, and Beryl Patmore will be there to provide friendship and support to deal with whatever the news might be. She prays for Elsie's health, not just because she does not want to lose the friend she has spent so many years working with, but also because she finds herself wondering if romance could actually blossom for these two strict creatures of habit, if the spectre of death is not looming over them.

She will leave it to fate though, a spinster such as herself has no business trying to help cupid along. The tangled romantic web in her kitchen is proof enough of how wrong things can go. Stranger things have happened though, and she won't begrudge her friends any happiness they might find.

 **A/N: A review or two would set me up forever.**


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